On second thought, yeah, let's call it a comeback.
I understand the hatred of Carl Pavano. Anyone who had been paying attention knew it was a dumb signing -- Pavano had one good year amid lots of injuries. But, four years and $39.95 million later, now the Yankees know it too.
But I don't get the "Pavano sucks" attitude I've been hearing on sports talk radio the last couple days. Pavano hasn't sucked. He hasn't been good, he hasn't earned his $39.95 million, he hasn't been what the Yankees apparently thought they were getting when they stupidly signed him in 2005, but he hasn't sucked. He's been either mediocre or absent.
Remember Ed Whitson and Steve Trout? Those guys sucked. They get an F. Pavano gets an incomplete. He just hasn't been here. I'm not sure which one is worse, the guy who shows up but can't get it done, or the guy who is borderline competent on the rare occasion he feels like playing.
Well, apparently he feels like playing now. We need a starter, so it's Pavano or Phil Hughes, who has been having a tough time in Triple-A (8.47 ERA, 1.65 WHIP). And personally, if you're going to rush a guy back, I'd rather it be Pavano. Or maybe you'd rather see Kei Igawa?
(Heck, if he was still with Alyssa Milano, I'd actually be looking forward to today's start. He also was dumped by Gia Allemand after he cheated on her. Apparently this wasn't good enough for Carl. He may have problems using his arm, but apparently not his penis.)
The knock on Glass Carl was that he pitched terribly -- or not at all -- until his contract year in '04, and suddenly he was good (18-8, 3.00 ERA, 1.17 WHIP). That's not exactly fair as he wasn't terrible in '03 (12-13, 4.30 ERA, 1.26 WHIP), but Pavano hasn't done anything in his Yankee career to convince us that he is willing to play through even the slightest discomfort. (Stiff neck, tight back... Bruised buttocks, anyone?)
Now at the end of this season his contract is up. The conspiracy theorists should be expecting a good September, right? Suddenly he feels good enough to pitch again. If Carl wants another contract this off-season, he should be in line for five or six quality starts.
I'll take it.
Oh, and as I pointed out to D. Isaac yesterday -- of the five catchers Pavano has thrown to most often in his career, who has the lowest OPS allowed?
Of course -- Ivan Rodriguez. When pitching to Pudge, Pavano has allowed a .257/.307/.408 (.715 OPS) line, compared to .276/.330/.427 (.757) overall. Yes, Rodriguez caught him during his only good run ('03-'04), and yes, that was in the N.L. Still, it's something to keep in mind.
I'm not busting out the Carl Pavano jersey for today's start. I'm just saying let's wring whatever we can get out of this waste of a contract and move on.
As someone who roots for both the Packers and the Jets, this is a strange time for me. My favorite player has been traded from my favorite team... to my second-favorite team.
Sportswriters keep throwing around the divorce analogy when discussing the Packer situation. To carry it out a bit further, it's like your parents get divorced and you're going to keep living with your mom and her new boyfriend, Aaron Rodgers. Your mom seems to be genuinely in love with Aaron but he gives you a weird vibe. It's probably the porn 'stache. Or maybe that time he told you to "get on board now or keep your mouth shut." Awkward!
Meanwhile, on weekends, you'll be staying with dad and his hot new girlfriend, Brett Favre, who wakes up early to make you blueberry pancakes and lets you pick the radio stations and almost never wears a bra.
OK, this analogy is getting a little creepy.
But this trade does leave me with a funny feeling inside.
Objectively, I think it's a good trade for both sides. I thought before the trade the Jets would be a playoff team, probably winning 10 games, thanks to their play fairly easy schedule and revamped offensive line. I think Favre gives them one or maybe two more wins -- and they can't catch New England, but they're a dangerous team in the playoffs. Maybe they lose the AFC Championship game to the Patriots -- undoubtedly on a Favre interception in the final minute. But hey, you live by the Favre, you die by the Favre.
That would mean the Packers get a 2nd Round pick for Favre, which is a great value for a guy you had to trade. And the fact that you got him out of the NFC is a bonus.
I'm not crazy about Rodgers. As I said when this all started, I'd rather trade Rodgers and have one or two more years of Favre, then switch to Brian Brohm. Favre made that impossible, of course, so we have to move on with Rodgers. But that doesn't mean I'm rushing out to buy a No. 12 jersey.
Everyone keeps talking about that great half against the Dallas Cowboys, but remember, that was a Cowboy team with a big lead that had prepared to face Favre, not Rodger the Dodger. Aaron has happy feet in the pocket. The Packers offense is all about timing and routes; that's not going to work if Rodgers is scrambling at the first sign of pressure. I could see the Packers going 9-7, but given the strength of their conference, that might be enough to be a wild card, or even the NFC North title.
Wouldn't it be neat if the Packers played the Jets in the Super Bowl? That'd be the real test for me, wouldn't it? A week ago, no question, I'm rooting for the Packers in that scenario. Now, well... still the Packers, but the devil on my shoulder is hoping Favre sticks it to Ted Thompson one last time.
Yeah, so, in the end, I'm still living with mom and putting up with Aaron. But I'm really looking forward to the weekends.
Ted Thompson hasn't ruled out the possibility of Brett Favre playing for the Green Bay Packers this season, but in what he described as a messy situation the general manager remained loyal to Aaron Rodgers as the team's starting quarterback. -- Tom Silverstein, Milwaukee Journal-Sentinel
And people say Brett Favre doesn't like this guy! Thompson sounds like quite the charmer.
If you had "benched for an inferior player" in your "How does Favre's consecutive game streak end?" pool, you might be in for some big bucks.
But although this is the way the story is being reported, let's not take it seriously for a minute. There is absolutely no way Favre comes back as a back-up for Aaron Rodgers. That's just silly.
So what's the point of this? To show Brett who has the hammer. And maybe, if they are exploring the possibility of trading Rodgers, it keeps his value up, at least a little. From Favre's point of view, it gives him the opportunity to say, "I'm still a good guy, I'll do what's best for the team." I'm sure his agent will play that card today or tomorrow. Even if Favre wants to be on another team, he has to do some rehab to his reputation. "Aw shucks I just wanna play football, I'll play linebacker if they need me to do that" is what everyone wants to hear.
But this may work itself out before too long anyway. Rodgers has made Nick Johnson look like Lou Gehrig, with a broken foot in 2006 and a pulled hamstring in 2007. Remember, this guy has never started a game. He's had 59 attempts in four years, almost half of those coming in the Cowboys game, and he's been hurt twice. (Both times oddly coming in weeks after Favre got hurt and was doubtful the following week.)
Would anyone be surprised if the Packers start training camp with Favre and Rodgers "sharing reps," but then Rodgers goes down with a strained oblique or a tweaked groin or Nintendo thumb? Then Peter King can do his huzzahs to the Iron Man and we won't have to hear about Rodgers again until next spring.
Not that I hate Rodgers or anything -- I really don't. I was "on board" when Favre was retired. But if my choice is the grizzle or the 'stache, I'll take the grizzle.
For the third straight season, Brett Favre has toyed with the emotions of Packer fans everywhere. Oh, Brett. I don't know how to quit you!
So, what to do in 2008? Frankly, I don't understand this argument that the Packers "owe" the starting job to Aaron Rodgers. Why do we owe anything to A-Rodge? He made a hell of a lot more money than I have since 2005, and we've started the same number of games. As I recall, some people thought Rodgers might go No. 1 in the 2005 draft, other mock drafts had him going anywhere from No. 3 to No. 5 to No. 8. Instead, after a few awkward hours of standing there like the kid picked last in kickball, he went 24th to the Packers. After three years of standing around in a baseball cap (when he wasn't on the trainer's table) and one good relief appearance in a blowout against the Cowboys last year, and now we owe him... what, exactly? Somehow more than we owe Favre?
Also, Aaron's comment about Packer fans -- "I don't think I need to sell myself to the fans. They need to get on board now or keep their mouths shut" -- didn't earn him a lot of points, either.
But then there's Favre. He obviously wants to play in the NFL for one more season (at least). But does he really want to be in Green Bay? Or has this been his plan all along, to retire and then unretire as a free agent?
There's two possibilities:
1) Brett wants out of Green Bay and nothing the Packers will do or say will get him to stay and be happy.
2) Brett will come back to the Packers, in which case you have to say screw Aaron Rodgers.
Let's explore Option 1. Can we all agree that in a Favre-less NFL, the Packers are the favorites to repeat as NFC North champs? Yes, we don't know what we have with Rodgers as our QB, but we know the Lions have Jon Kitna, the Bears have Rex Grossman and the Vikings have Tarvaris Jackson. All three of those guys had more INTs than TDs last year.
But if you put Favre on the Bears -- with Devin Hester and their defense -- and they're the division champs. Put him on the Vikings with Adrian Peterson, and they are. (You'd have to get the 1996 version of Favre to help the Lions.)
So I don't see how you let Favre just walk. He's a valuable commodity, first off, and secondly if you let him walk he very likely walks to a rival and maybe takes the NFC North title with him. If it's Option 1 and Brett won't come back, you have to trade him -- the Jets, the Texans, the Panthers, wherever. Favre has a no-trade clause, but the Packers have the hammer -- either agree to the trade, report to Packer camp, or stay retired.
If it's Option 2, and Favre can be convinced to stay in Green Bay for one more season, the answer is obvious: You trade Rodgers.
He's in the fourth year of a five-year contract, so if you bench him in 2008 to sit behind Favre, you figure he's going to be pissed -- and will walk after the 2009 season.
On the other hand, the Packers just drafted Brian Brohm, a guy some people thought would have been the first pick overall if he came out as a junior in 2007. Instead he stays an extra year in college and goes in the second round to the Pack. Now he gets a year of sitting behind Brett and gets thrown into the fire in 2009. Is there any evidence to suggest he'll be that much worse than Rodgers anyway?
Well, Yankee fans, here we are again, 20-24, 6 games out. But hey, look at the bright side - last year we had the very same record but were 10-1/2 games out.
And last year things got worse -- we'd finish the month 22-29 -- before they got better. But we went 72-39 the rest of the way.
So yeah, it's possible we'll do that again and win the wild card, maybe even the division. But wouldn't it be nice if this team could play all six months of the season, instead of only the last four?
It's just not easy to beat a guy like Oliver Perez with five lefties in the lineup (and when one of the righties is Alberto Gonzalez).
Perez vs RHB: .285 BA, .390 OBP, .398 SLG Perez vs LHB: .094 BA, .269 OBP, .208 SLG
I don't know why Girardi left Morgan Ensberg and Shelley Duncan on the bench; you would think their only purpose in life is to mash guys like Ollie. If you aren't going to use them last night, why have them on the team? I do realize that Ensberg is hitting .214 (.179 vs LHP) and Duncan is hitting .194 (.240 vs LHP), but it's not like Giambi and Cano are hitting either. If they put Gonzalez at second, Ensberg at third and Duncan at first, do they win the game? Who knows. Maybe Duncan doesn't waste an out in the 4th inning the way Giambi did (trying to force Carlos Beltran instead of getting the easier out at first), and the Mets don't score 4 runs that inning. Maybe the offense produces more than 2 runs. Or maybe they get shut out, who knows.
All I know is this is a very frustrating team to watch right now, and when things were bleak last year, it was guys like Duncan who fired up the team and finally got them playing with some heart again.
Get them in the game, Joe. At this point, what do we have to lose?
I have not relented in my unhealthy obsession with Bobby Hill, not the kid from King of the Hill but rather the former can't-miss prospect who missed. Hill was a Scott Boras client who elected not to sign with the White Sox after they took him in the second round of the 1999 amateur draft; instead, he played a year with the independent league Newark Bears. The following year, the Cubs took him in the draft and he did sign. After a few years in the minors, but never really getting a shot to play, and a few injuries, he's now back where it all began, with the Newark Bears.
Through Newark's first 18 games, Bobby is still getting on base (.373 OBP) but is hitting just .246; he no longer has any speed and he never had much power. A .246 BA/.721 OPS from a second baseman wouldn't impress you if he did it in Triple-A, and this isn't even Triple-A. This is the Atlantic League, where the level of competition is uneven to say the least.
At least Bobby is out-hitting a couple other former phenoms, Randall Simon and Calvin Pickering. In fact, you could go through the Atlantic League and put together an intriguing roster of has-beens, almost-weres and never-wuzzes.
The Atlantic League's "Where Are They Now?" All-Star Team:
Starters: C Jason Phillips (Camden) - .320/.393/.400 in 25 AB 1B Randall Simon (Newark) - .226/.258/.306 in 62 AB 2B Brent Abernathy (Long Island) - .320/.346/.360 in 50 AB 3B Brandon Larson (Somserset) - .338/.411/.508 in 65 AB SS Alex Prieto (Bridgeport) - .191/.263/.235 in 68 AB LF Curtis Pride (Maryland) - .212/.350/.318 in 66 AB CF Val Majewski (Newark) - .300/.390/.400 in 50 AB RF Carl Everett (Long Island) - .323/.440/.468 in 62 AB DH Calvin Pickering (Bridgeport) - .161/.333/.339 in 56 AB
Reserves: C Mike Rose (Long Island) - .156/.289/.219 in 32 AB C/1B Matt LeCroy (Lancaster) - .129/.206/.226 in 31 AB UT Bobby Hill (Newark) - .246/.373/.348 in 69 AB UT Damian Jackson (Maryland) - .000/.222/.000 in 7 AB OF Mike Vento (Camden) - .125/.200/.125 in 8 AB
Starting Pitchers: SP John Halama (Maryland) - 2.36 ERA, 0.97 WHIP in 26.2 IP SP Brian Lawrence (Camden) - 3.97 ERA, 1.37 WHIP in 22.2 IP SP Eric Dubose (Bridgeport) - 4.50 ERA, 1.55 WHIP in 22.0 IP SP Ryan Drese (Camden) - 4.87 ERA, 1.57 WHIP in 20.1 IP SP Jason Simontacchi (Long Island) - 6.43 ERA, 1.64 WHIP in 14.0 IP
Relievers: RP Bret Prinz (Somerset) - 0.00 ERA, 1.00 WHIP in 9.0 IP RP Travis Wade (Maryland) - 3.12 ERA, 1.50 WHIP in 8.2 IP RP Wayne Franklin (York) - 3.86 ERA, 1.41 WHIP in 16.1 IP RP Jeff Farnsworth (Maryland) - 6.35 ERA, 1.59 WHIP in 22.2 IP RP Will Cunnane (Newark) - 6.55 ERA, 1.91 WHIP in 11.0 IP RP Brian Shackelford (Maryland) - 0.00 ERA, 3.00 WHIP in 1.1 IP
The Yankees have suddenly been hit with a couple big injuries.
Jorge Posada has a "tear in his subscapularis muscle"... that doesn't sound good. What sounds even worse is he's going to go visit with Dr. James Andrews. Andrews had earlier said he didn't think Posada would need surgery, but the shoulder hasn't gotten any better. At this point all we know is he is probably going on the D.L. for the first time in his 13-year career.
Adding to the frustration, the Yankees just designated Chad Moeller for assignment, so now it's just Jose Molina and presumably Chris Stewart from Scranton (.270 BA, .737 OPS). Stewart is an intriguing fellow as he has a .386 OBP... in 37 ABs, he has 7 walks and 0 strikeouts. But don't get too excited -- he has a career .313 OBP (.252 BA, .361 SLG) in seven minor league seasons. If Moeller clears waivers maybe they'll bring him back, or troll the free agent catcher market and see who needs a job. Does anyone have Mike Lieberthal's phone number? I guess if all else fails we can always suit up Girardi for old times' sake.
Then there's Brian Bruney, who suffered the dreaded Lisfranc injury and might be gone for the rest of the season. I know Bruney wasn't high on anyone's pre-season "Yankees I hope don't get Lisfranc'd" list, but he was one of our best non-Joba middle relief options this year (11.1 IP, 7 H, 2 ER, 6 BB, 12 K).
Luckily we have a lot of depth at Triple-A when it comes to bullpen help. Edwar Ramirez has been just filthy in Scranton (9.0 IP, 2 H, 0 R, 1 BB, 13 K). Jose Veras (11.0 IP, 7 H, 2 ER, 4 BB, 18 K), Heath Phillips (12.2 IP, 3 H, 3 ER, 4 BB, 11 K) and Sean Henn (6.2 IP, 5 H, 1 ER, 1 BB, 7 K) have pitched well also. I think you call up Edwar and hope Ross Ohlendorff gets straightened out.
First, I don't really like Hawkins. The Yankees desperately needed middle relief help, but Hawkins? The guy with a career 4.70 ERA, 1.47 WHIP? Check his career numbers against Boston (5.23 ERA, 1.39 WHIP), Cleveland (5.27, 1.78) and Anaheim/Los Angeles (5.85, 1.73), the A.L.'s three post-season teams last year.
Most alarming of all, the Yankees have hit Hawkins to the tune of a 6.44 ERA, 1.61 WHIP and .327 BAA. Wouldn't it have made more sense for us to pay another team to take him? He helps us more when he's pitching for an opponent!
We've been collecting guys like this since the end of the great Ramiro Mendoza/Mike Stanton/Jeff Nelson triumverate. He's a proud successor to the heritage of Luis Vizcaino, Felix Rodriguez, Felix Heredia, Paul Quantrill and Antonio Osuna.
But there weren't a lot of great middle relievers available this off-season, and we needed somebody who could throw strikes. (For all his faults, he doesn't give up a lot of walks... just hits.) Frankly, Hawkins isn't a problem if he's a mop-up guy, and hopefully that's what he'll be as I'm assuming Joe Girardi knows that Brian Bruney and Ross Ohlendorf are both better options to bridge the gap to Joba and Mo.
But I think it was stupid to boo a guy for his number. If the Yankees wanted to retire No. 21, they didn't need LaTroy's permission to do it. And the bottom line is? I don't think the number should be retired.
Paul O'Neill was a very good player who I will always remember, but retired numbers should be for the true Yankee greats, and he wasn't. He's like Hank Bauer, Roy White, Tommy Tresh. Guys who are beloved by the fans of that generation, but an immortal? I'm sorry, but when you make your list of all-time Yankee outfielders, where do you put the Warrior? In terms of runs created as a Yankee, he ranks eighth (858), between Bob Meusel (876) and Tommy Henrich (856). Don't like runs created? OK, in career OPS, he's 9th (.869) among Yankee OFs, behind the likes of Charlie Keller (.928), George Selkirk (.883), and, again, Henrich (.873). If you want to use Adjusted OPS to take into account his era, it doesn't help your case: He's now tied for 13th at 125 with Hideki Matsui, Bernie Williams and Birdie Cree. (Henrich is 9th.)
I don't point this out to denigrate O'Neill, who, as I said, was a very good player and by all accounts a very nice, very funny guy. In 40 years, I will tell my grandchildren stories about O'Neill's legendary tantrums and the crowd chanting his name in 2001. It doesn't matter if there's a No. 21 plaque on the wall or not. And they'll think of O'Neill the way I think of Henrich, a very good player who belongs to my grandfather's generation.
I like what the Yankees had done with O'Neill's number, leave it out of circulation for a little while, then quietly bring it back. (Honestly, if it were up to me, I'd make Numbers 1 and 9 available again too, but that ain't gonna happen.) I don't remember any outrage when Morgan Ensberg wore 21 in spring training. I wonder what would've happened if he had just kept it? Could it be that No. 21 just looks better on a white guy?
All that said... Hawkins had a 9.00 ERA and 1.86 WHIP as No. 21; last night, as No. 22, he pitched two scoreless innings, giving up just one hit and striking out 2, and earned his first Yankee win. So maybe the fans were right after all.
Last year I made some predictions about how the baseball season would go. I thought the Yankees would win the A.L. East and the Red Sox would win the Wild Card; flip those two. I had the Indians winning the Central; they did. I blew the West, picking the A's over the Angels. Whoops.
In the N.L., I picked the Mets to win the East, with the Phillies close enough behind them to win the Wild Card. Well, that almost happened, except the Mets decided to take September off, stumbling to a bizarre finish that left them a game behind Philadelphia and two games out of the Wild Card. Ah well. In the Central, I admitted I had no idea and threw a dart at the Astros. Yikes. They went 73-89, finishing 12 games behind the Central champion Cubs. In the West, I picked the Padres, who finished a game out, but that was only good enough for 3rd place. The D-Backs and Rockies tied, with Colorado going in as the Wild Card.
So now you know not to listen to me.
But what the heck, let's try again.
AMERICAN LEAGUE A.L. East: As a Yankee fan I have no choice but to pick the Bombers. Both teams have some question marks in their rotations, but the Yankees have the better offense - let's not forget they led MLB with 5.98 runs per game last year, while the Red Sox were 4th (5.35), behind the Phillies (5.51) and Tigers (5.48). The Yankees gave the Sox a two-month head start and finished 2 games behind the Red Sox; this year it's the Sox starting with injury problems in their rotation. So, I'm taking Yankees followed by the Wild Card-winning Red Sox. I think the Rays and Jays will battle it out for third and the Orioles bring up the rear.
A.L. Central: Wow, people really love the Tigers. They may score 1,000 runs. They won't - but when you consider their pitching staff, will 1,000 runs be enough? It's possible the Tigers slug their way to 90 wins, and maybe that's enough to win the Central, but maybe not. I'll take the Indians again, followed by the Tigers, then the White Sox and Royals, with the Twins dropping to last place.
A.L. West: Well, even I've been convinced not to pick Oakland this year. I still hate the Angels, but the Rangers are such a screwed-up organization I just can't pick them. Every year they whine about pitching and every year they go out and trade for... batters. Nice. I know the Mariners won 88 games last year, but that was a fluke; on the other hand, they added Erik Bedard. Let's call it even and say they win 88 games again, which I don't think will be enough. So, Angels, Mariners, Rangers, A's.
A.L. Awards: Even though I'm picking the Yankees to win the East, I'll give the MVP to Manny Ramirez as he carries the battered Red Sox to the Wild Card with a ridiculous September, and give the A.L. Cy Young to, what the hell, Erik Bedard, though the Mariners come up short of the playoffs.
NATIONAL LEAGUE N.L. East: They're bedeviled by injuries at the moment but I can't see the Mets collapsing again. They should post the best record in the N.L. I'm thinking the Braves will finish just ahead of the Phillies but comes up a few games short of the Wild Card. The Nationals are closer to 3rd than to last, but that still leaves them in 4th. The Marlins bring up the rear again.
N.L. Central: Same ol' same ol' out here. The Cubs have some more bats to go with their pitchers and should repeat as Central champs. Everybody else in this division is playing for .500. I'll throw them up in the air and say, Brewers, Reds, Cardinals (what's the over/under for the date of Albert Pujols's season-ending elbow injury?), Astros, Pirates, but who cares.
N.L. West: This is a tough division; you can make a case for anybody except the Giants, who might be the worst team in baseball. Arizona and San Diego have great pitching, Colorado has a good offense and Los Angeles has a little of each. I think the Rockies hang around for awhile but can't keep up; that leaves three teams battling it out for two spots. I think the Diamondbacks come out ahead, and then let's make Joe Torre happy and say the Dodgers get the Wild Card - of their last 13 games, 10 are against the Pirates and Giants, and three are home against San Diego. That leaves the Padres sulking in third place, the Rockies in fourth and of course the Giants last.
N.L. Awards: Mediocre A.L. pitchers look good when they go to the N.L.; how is Johan Santana going to look? But I work with too many pessimistic Mets fans, who have convinced me he'll break down sometime in August. Let's say Brandon Webb takes his second Cy Young in three years, and David Wright wins the MVP.
POST-SEASON A.L. Playoffs: Yankees over Indians (no bugs this time), and Red Sox over Angels. Yankees over Red Sox in the another 7-game classic.
N.L. Playoffs: Mets over Dodgers; DBacks over Cubs. DBacks over Mets in 6.
World Series: Finally, revenge for the 2001 World Series. Yankees in 6.
Maybe it's a good sign that there's so little drama in Yankeeland this year - what, no one cares any more if A-Rod and Jeter still have sleepovers? - that the biggest story out of spring training is that Billy Crystal is going to suit up and play in tomorrow's game against the Pirates.
When I first heard this, I was like, "whatever." And then I heard people calling WFAN and ESPN Radio and whining about how horrible this was, what a sacrilege, what an insult to the game, and I thought about what they were saying, and I was like... "whatever."
Is it hatred of Billy Crystal or hatred of the Yankees or just general pissing and moaning in general that has convinced anyone to care about this? Spring training is just that, training. The games don't count. They play college teams and split squads and minor leaguers with numbers you normally only see on wide receivers.
And why hate on Billy? It's going to be his new best day.
I wonder how many of these same idiots complaining about one game with Billy Crystal remember that Garth Brooks did this -- in three spring trainings! -- including going 0-for-17 with the Mets in 2000. Somehow that's not an insult to the game, because, uh... Garth is a big star? I dunno. Hell, George Plimpton did this 40 years ago and wrote a book about it. And do I even have to bring up Michael Jordan?
If it's OK for Yankees to pretend to act, it's OK for actors to pretend to be Yankees.
Look, the bottom line? If Billy Crystal playing in a meaningless spring training game makes you mad, maybe you oughtta try hitting a pillow.
I'm sure everyone has seen this commercial by now.
Now, does anyone else watch this commercial and identify more with the geeks than the cool kid, "Chad"?
When Chad says, "So what level Dungeon Master are you guys?", I said "Dungeon Masters don't have levels" at the same moment they did!
I guess whoever made this commercial has figured out that geeks are cool now, because they've turned the geeks into wiggers.
Yeah, that's not too played.
A lot of people I ask about the "dungeon master" commercial know it's for a cell phone, but they either don't know which one or think it's for Verizon. It's actually for Alltel. But considering how stupid the commercials are, maybe it's better that people are confused.
This is the Bobby Hill who was drafted by the White Sox in the second round of the 1999 amateur draft, but super agent Scott Boras told him to hold out and instead play the 2000 season as a shortstop with the Newark Bears. Hill, a 22-year-old switch-hitter, hit .326 with a .442 OBP and stole a franchise-record 81 bases. He also had 13 home runs and 82 RBIs.
As I've mentioned here before, I saw Hill play a few times that year. Now, the Atlantic League isn't anywhere near the majors -- it's mostly has-beens, could'a-beens and never-wuzzes. So the level of talent wasn't great, but still, Hill was just on another planet. If you've played beer league softball, you know how you can spot the ringer 'cause he's the one guy shows up wearing actual baseball pants? Well, in the Atlantic League that year, Hill was that guy. Everyone else comes up to the plate hacking and slashing; he'd be the guy taking a strike and fouling off tough pitches and holding up on sliders in the dirt and driving the ball the other way. He could run, he could hit, he could field. You just knew he'd be a star.
The following year, Hill was drafted by the Cubs and eventually signed with them. He hit .301 (.394 OBP) with 20 SBs in Double-A; in 2002, he hit .280 (.367 OBP) with 29 SB in Triple-A, got promoted to the majors and hit .253 (.327 OBP) in 190 ABs as a second baseman. But the Cubs sent him back to Triple-A in 2003, where he hit .269 (.339 OBP), then near the end of the season traded him (as the player to be named later) in the deal that landed them Aramis Ramirez.
Hill played almost all of 2004 in the majors, hitting .266 with a .353 OBP in 233 ABs (but 126 games) for the Pirates playing second and third. You'd think that'd be enough to stick the following year, but you don't know the Pirates. He again bounced between Triple-A and the majors in 2005, hitting .241 (.336 OBP) in Triple-A and .269 (.343 OBP) in the bigs. Then he got traded to the Padres -- for a pitcher named Clayton Hamilton -- and spent all of 2006 in the minors. He hit .282 with a .396 OBP, but the Padres never called him up. They released him at the end of the year and he missed all of 2007 after undergoing back surgery.
I think it's a smart move for Hill. Maybe GMs don't like what happened with Boras after the '99 draft. Maybe Hill has fungus on his shower shoes. Or maybe they're just more comfortable with guys like Mark Bellhorn - a guy ahead of him on the depth chart with the Cubs and the Padres, even though Bells hit .209 in '03 and .190 in '06.
Whatever the reason, it seems obvious he wasn't going to get a chance to make the bigs, even as a utilityman, despite a respectable MLB career batting average of .262 (.343 OBP) in 523 AB, and .277 (.367 OBP) in 1,424 AB in the minors. Now he's 30, and it seems most of his speed has left him, and who knows if he can still play short. The Bears might be his last chance to showcase what's left of his skills and maybe get a ticket back to the big leagues.
I'm hoping to see him in Newark this summer and see something of the kid who looked like a future star just eight years ago. Even if it's just a glimpse.
This time of year there are always so many stories about how pitchers are throwing great and looking great and feeling great. And if you're a geek like me hungry for any kind of fantasy baseball insight, I love reading that Johnny Damon says he had a great off-season and Jose Reyes says he's going to be more serious and Eric Chavez says he's finally healthy again.
I know 99 percent of these stories are sportswriters looking to fill up column inches before the spring training games start. There's nothing to do right now but talk to players and what are they going to say? "I spent the off-season eating pizza and ice cream. Really! There's this place by my house where you can get ice cream as a topping."
Girardi caught Kyle Farnsworth 73 times when both were with the Chicago Cubs from 2000 to 2002, and both think their prior relationship could help Farnsworth bounce back after two shaky seasons.
"He was kind of a mentor to me when I was coming up as a young player," Farnsworth said. "So I think it's going to be a good time.
"He looked out for me. ... He knows how to get the best out of me."
Girardi said he believes in Farnsworth, who has a 4.57 ERA as a Yankee.
"The first thing is, I believe he's got good stuff," Girardi said, "because I've seen it first-hand, and I believe he still has it."
What they didn't tell you: Farnsie had a 2.74 ERA and 1.15 WHIP with the Cubs in '01... but in the '00 and '02 versions, he combined for a 6.77 ERA and 1.75 WHIP. So the much-celebrated Farnsworth/Girardi years produced a 5.16 ERA, which is more than a half-run worse than what he's done in two years as a Yankee!
One amazing thing about baseball is you can live in the now, breathing the excitement of each pitch. However, you can also plan your fandom for the future. Who will the next big star be in Major League Baseball? Who will the next big star be for my team?
This young man could very easily be in the starting rotation for the New York Yankees in 2009. He is young, he is talented, he is half Iranian half Japanese and I hope he is pitching in New York sooner, rather than later. Ladies and gentlemen, I present the great Yu Darvish.
I guess whatever miraculous healing power Curt Schilling used on his ankle doesn't work for shoulders.
Or maybe they test for it now.
Either way, it looks like Schilling is out until at least the All-Star Break, if not the year. Or his career could be over.
I have two reasons to hate Schilling - 2001 World Series, 2004 ALCS. But I also have two reasons not to hate him - I like that he has a game design company (yes, I'm a geek), and I like that he has done so much to fight ALS, even naming his son Gehrig.
So on balance those cancel out.
No, not really. Fuck him and his ketchup-leaking ankle. Why couldn't anyone try to drop a bunt on that pudgy gimp? Ridiculous. But at least I'll be able to hate him a lot less if his career is over.
What I'm really wondering today is how Red Sox fans feel about him right now. They all loved him and his bloody sock. They loved his trash-talking on his blog and Sons of Sam Horn. But you have to wonder how they would have gone about their business this off-season if they'd known they might be without Schilling this year.
The Red Sox certainly wouldn't have signed Schilling to that $8 million one-year contract if they knew his shoulder tendon looked like "three strands of spaghetti." (What's it supposed to look like, rigatoni?) And even if they had signed him to a bargain-basement contract, they could have insisted on surgery back in November.
But would they have been more aggressive in going after Johan Santana, Erik Bedard or Dan Haren?
Red Sox fans are saying the loss of Schilling is no big deal, they only gave him 150 innings and 9 wins last year. But there's a big difference between having a starting rotation of four veterans and one rookie, and three veterans and two rookies - especially when one of those veterans is Tim Wakefield, who also battled shoulder problems last year. Josh Beckett is unquestionably an ace, and Daisuke Matsuzaka should be better after adjusting to the league last year. But after that? They can turn within and try Jon Lester, Clay Buchholz, Devern Hansack and/or Kyle Snyder. The Yankees tried the rookie-of-the-month rotation the first half of last year and it didn't work so well, so good luck with that.
More likely they'll trade for a veteran - maybe Joe Blanton, but you know Billy Beane isn't going to just give him away - or sign whoever is still out there. Bartolo Colon, Kris Benson, Steve Trachsel, Shawn Chacon... Yeah, it's ugly.
I don't want to oversell the loss of Schilling - no one is suggesting you can now write the Red Sox off. But it certainly changes the dynamic heading into 2008. And if I was a Red Sox fan, I'd rather have known about Schilling in November, instead of a week before pitchers and catchers report.
Bernie Williams was a great Yankee. For 16 years he played centerfield in the Bronx with dignity and professionalism. He was a pretty good player too. He appeared in 5 All Star games and is one of the most prolific post season performers in baseball history, lingering at or near the top of every major statistical category.
I remember Bernie's entire career from the debates about who the better Williams was (Gerald Williams was a Yankee prospect at the time Bernie came up) to marveling at the endless supply of big hits Bernie provided in the playoffs. I also remember the end of his career with the Yankees. I thought he lingered too long and should have retired a couple of year earlier than he did because he wasn't providing much value at the plate or in the field. I didn't care though. I was willing to endure an aging Yankee star as payment for what he provided us for those many years.
When I see stories like this, as a fan, I get upset. This story quotes current Yankee general manager Brian Cashman speaking about Bernie Williams negatively.
The rift between Williams and the team got personal on Friday night. Speaking at William Paterson University in New Jersey, general manager Brian Cashman said Williams spent too much time with his burgeoning music career "and that took away from his play" on the field. Cashman said Williams had a "terrible season" in 2005 and former manager Joe Torre was wrong to play Williams as often as he did in 2006 because better players were available.
My question is why? What good does it serve to hurt Bernie Williams, a man who served honorably at the pleasure of the Yankees for 16 years? What good does it serve to bash a player who not only peformed far above the average major leaguer, but was also an ambassador of the game and a classy guy? What good does it serve to bash a guy who was a key piece of 4 championship seasons? Doesn't Cashman have enough to worry about with pitchers and catchers around the corner and a new Field Marshal Steinbrenner at the helm? As a Yankee fan I would love to see him focus on what's important, the future of the New York Yankees, and let the fans worry about evaluating things that happened years ago.
• It sucks when your team loses to a team you know you should have beaten.
• It sucks when your team loses to a team you know you should have beaten when you work in an office surrounded by fans of that team.
After every Giant loss I'd heard about how they hated Eli "Fredo" Manning, about how they wanted to fire Tom Coughlin, about how Michael Strahan was a selfish jerk, blah blah blah.
I guess they don't hate Eli any more.
I'm looking forward to next year's 6-10 season so they can all start ripping their team again, but in the meantime I have to endure two weeks of National Public Radio, because there is no way I'm going to listen to Giant fans spending the rest of the month jerking each other off on WFAN. It's going to be bad enough getting hit with the spatter at work.
Let's say you run the Yankees and I run the Red Sox, and in the interest of putting aside our long-standing rivalry, we should make a fair trade that will make everybody happy.
How about you trade me 21-year-old right-hander Phil Hughes for 24-year-old left-hander Jon Lester.
Hughes, in 13 MLB starts, has a 4.46 ERA and a 1.28 WHIP, with 29 BB and 58 K in 72.2 IP; in the minors, a 2.09 ERA and a 0.86 WHIP with 66 BB and 311 Ks in 275 IP.
Lester, in 26 MLB starts, has a 4.68 ERA, 1.46 WHIP, 74 BB and 110 K in 144.1 IP; in the minors, a 3.33 ERA, 1.31 WHIP, 203 BB and 446 K in 484 IP.
What? No deal?
OK. How about if Lester came with Coco Crisp, a 28-year-old center fielder who hit .268 with a .712 OPS last year (career .280, .738) and will make $4.75 million next year. Would that convince you to make the deal?
Oh wait - but you have to throw in 22-year-old Melky Cabrera, who hit .273 with a .718 OPS last year (career .280, .728) and makes $432,400. Does that make the deal better?
No? Sheesh. OK, how about if I also give you 22-year-old right-hander Justin Masterson (4.34 ERA, 1.16 WHIP, 18 BB, 59 K in Double-A). But you have to also include 22-year-old right-hander Jeff Marquez (3.65 ERA, 1.35 WHIP, 44 BB, 94 K in Double-A).
Still won't pull the trigger? Fine. I'll throw in 23-year-old middle infielder Jed Lowrie (.300, .862 OPS in Triple-A).
What is wrong with you?
Alright, stop whining. Let's try a different deal. How about you give me Hughes, Cabrera and Marquez, and instead of Lester and Crisp, I'll give you Lowrie, Masterson and... (drumroll)... Jacoby Ellsbury! The 23-year-old center fielder hit .353/.394/.509 in 116 major league at-bats last year, and .314/.390/.426 over a three-year minor league career. No question he's a good young hitter... a good enough hitter to get me Hughes, wouldn't you say?
No?... you are impossible to deal with!
If the Twins don't think Hughes and Cabrera is enough for Johan Santana, that's fine. But how anyone can think that Lester/Crisp or just Ellsbury is a better offer just boggles my mind.
Baseball America graded out four offers for Santana and say either of the Red Sox offers is better than the Yankee offer. (The Mets offer comes out last, if only because all the players involved are so young that they're all gambles.) Obviously I know far less about baseball than the people at Baseball America. But on what planet is Hughes not worth more than Ellsbury or Lester+Crisp?
Are Masterson and Lowrie so much more valuable than Cabrera and Marquez that it makes up for the difference with Hughes?
Young pithers are a fragile commodity, I get that. The long list of superstars-to-be who never made it is long and sad. I'm sure you can find guys with minor league numbers as good or better than Hughes who never made it. But you can make that same argument about Lester or Masterson or any other young pitcher.
And I'm not trying to sell Cabrera as being on Ellsbury's level. (But surely he's worth more than Crisp!) But if you had Hughes, would you really trade him for Ellsbury straight up?
I'm not buying any of this. I think the Twins want Hughes, but they're also trying to get Ian Kennedy or somebody else out of the Yankees, and the Yankees are sticking to their initial offer. So what do you do if you're the Twins? Of course, you run to the Red Sox and Mets, say their offers are better, and hope the Yankees bite and put more on the table.
But Baseball America would trade Hughes and Melky for Lester and Crisp?
Who would'a thunk that Eli would be the only Manning playing in the conference championship game?
I guess Tony Romo's Hall of Fame induction ceremony will have to wait, although I don't agree with those who are blaming the loss on him - or Jessica Simpson (or her look-alike). Yes, he threw the INT that ended the game, but the Cowboys had plenty of chances to win this game. The Giants couldn't put the game away in the fourth quarter, having two three-and-outs. In the end, the Cowboys got the ball back with 1:50 on the clock, one time out and 48 yards to go for the game-winning touchdown. I thought for sure we were heading to Texas. But then the Cowboys did an even better job of imploding than the Giants did. Game over.
So don't blame Tony. It's unfair. They lost as a team, man.
As much as I would've liked to avenge our Week 13 loss to the Cowboys, I have to like our chances in Green Bay against the Giants a lot more than another trip to Dallas.
I'm preparing for an onslaught of Eli-Favre comparisons. They both went to school in Mississippi and they're both good ol' boys. Favre married his high school sweetheart; Manning is engaged to his college girlfriend. They'll try to make some kind of "Favre wasn't built in a day" type analogy to Eli. It's funny, when the Giants win everyone loves Eli, but when they lose, he's Fredo Corleone. That's the curse of being a Manning, or a Corleone for that matter. I'm sure Fredo would've found a nice job at his own pace if they'd left him alone, but instead they made him go into the family business.
After three ugly minutes, the Packers settled down and took care of business yesterday, sending a message with a 42-20 win over the Seahawks.
The Seahawks have a lot of ties to the Packers - coach Mike Holmgren, offensive coordinator Gil Haskell and quarterback Matt Hasselbeck - and if we hadn't knocked them out of the playoffs they'd be the team I'd be rooting for.
It was an ugly first three minutes. You could just sense the sportswriters were already trying to come up with their stories. Hm, should we say the Packers are rusty from their bye week? Or that they're a young team and couldn't handle the post-season pressure? Or maybe they weren't "battle-tested" because they played an easy schedule?
But after spotting them two touchdowns, the Pack roared back. Brett Favre stayed cool, Ryan Grant redeemed himself in a huge way, and Atari Bigby was flying around like a lunatic. It was a great game. Even a vintage Favre "what the hell is he doing?" pass - that stumbling, wobbling, no-look underhanded toss to Donald Lee.
Whoa, I see I haven't done a Theme Team since August. Let's get back on track with a team near and dear to my heart... the All-Butch Team.
You might think this is a team of all women's field hockey players. And you would be wrong. That's mean. Because there are some women who play field hockey who aren't butch at all. And some who very clearly could kick my ass. So as to not to offend either group, let's move on with the team, shall we?
The All-Butch Team
What is your name? Butch. What does it mean? I'm American, honey. Our names don't mean shit. -- Pulp Fiction
I thought I could field a team of just guys whose first name appears as "Butch" in Baseball Reference, but there's not enough of them for a full team -- there's only 16. So I also included guys who are listed as having the nickname "Butch," and a couple minor leaguers. As it was I could only find eight pitchers, including two from college teams and one had just one appearance in the minors.
Apparently if you want your kid to grow up to be a catcher, give him the nickname Butch. I could barely scrape together 25 players for a roster, and yet I found eight guys named Butch who were catchers. Go figure.
The other thing I learned from doing this list is if you name your son Elmer or Wallace or Clell, and then doubly screw him by giving him a middle name like Le Roy or McArthur or Lavern, you can pretty much guarantee your kid will either be beaten up a lot, or beat up a lot of other kids and thus get a nickname like Butch.
BATTERS:
C Butch Wynegar: Harold Delano Wynegar Jr. came up with the Twins, finishing second in the Rookie of the Year balloting as a 20-year-old catcher in '76 (.260 BA, .719 OPS), but to me he'll always be a Yankee. A switch-hitter who could work a walk but had absolutely no power -- his career slugging average (.347) is actually less than his career on-base percentage (.348). How is that possible? You need to have a lot of sacrifices. He had 58 career sacrifice bunts compared to 65 career home runs. That's pretty impressive. He's now the hitting coach for the Scranton/Wilkes-Barre Yankees, a team I suspect will have some very good bunters.
1B Butch Schmidt: Charles John Schmidt had four years in the bigs -- one game as a pitcher with the 1909 Highlanders, and three years as a first baseman with the Boston Braves. His best year came in 1914, helping to lead the "Miracle Braves" to an improbable comeback and World Series sweep. Schmidt hit .285 with a .350 OBP, which must have been pretty good, because he tied for 16th in the MVP voting. He apparently was a very good fielder.
2B Butch Kolloway: Donald Martin Kolloway also went by "Cab," which is funnier. But someone apparently called him Butch. Kolloway was pretty big for a 1940s second baseman (6'3", 200 pounds) and later played third and first, but played more than 600 of his 1,079 MLB games at second base. His best year was probably 1949, when he hit .292 -- a very empty .292 (.359 OBP, .355 SLG, 7 SB, 7 CS). But that same year he had 49 walks to just 26 strikeouts in 487 at-bats.
3B Butch Keltner: Kenneth Frederick Keltner -- I've always heard him referred to just as Ken, but hey, it says (Butch) next to his name on Baseball Reference, and we need players, so he's in. Keltner's last game was in 1950, so as fans who saw him play continue to die off, he'll probably be best remembered for the "Keltner List" created by Bill James. Looking at his numbers now, it's hard to believe anyone thought he should be in the Hall of Fame. I guess his best year was 1948, when he hit .297 (.395 OBP, .522 SLG) with 31 HR and 119 RBI. That was one of only two seasons where he had 100 RBIs, and one of three where he had more than 20 HRs. But he was a six-time All-Star and was a good fielder.
SS Butch Kirby: The only Butch I've found, minors or majors, to ever play any shortstop at all. In 289 minor league games, Kirby played 19 games at short, and that is apparently the Butch record. Sad, isn't it? His best year was '81, in the Rookie League for the Brewers; he hit .307 (.736 OPS). His career minor league numbers are atrocious (.246, .618) but I need a shortstop. Apparently there also was a professional bull rider named Butch Kirby in the 1980s; maybe he gave up baseball for rodeo?
LF Butch Nieman: Elmer Le Roy Nieman was an outfielder with the Boston Braves during World War II. His best year was probably his last one, when he hit .247 but with a .361 OBP and .478 SLG; he also had 14 HRs and 11 SBs, in just 247 ABs. If they had rotisserie baseball in '45 he would've been a great $1 player for somebody. When the war was over and the stars came back to the league, Nieman was sent back to the minors and never got another chance, even though he put up some Jack Cust-like numbers: he led the Western Association in HRs, RBIs and BBs for four straight years. Like many other Butches on this list, he also was a minor-league manager.
CF Butch Davis: Wallace McArthur Davis had a hell of a rookie year in '83, but then gave it all back the next season. Really! He had I think two of the most remarkable back-to-back years in MLB history: .344/.359/.508 in 122 AB, and then .147/.211/.224 in 116 AB. How can you be that good one year and that bad the next? After that, Davis would have to wait until '93 to get another chance, and it was pretty much right down the middle (.245/.273/.415). He's now a minor league instructor with the Baltimore Orioles, not the head coach of the University of North Carolina football team.
RF Butch Huskey: Robert Leon Huskey was aptly named -- they said he weighed 244 pounds but I think that was with only one foot on the scale. If your last name is Huskey you definitely don't want to get sent to fat camp, but that's what happened. At the time he was "a good 30 pounds" over 244. I remember in the early 1990s there was a big battle as to who would be the next great Met batter, Huskey or Carl Everett. Despite Butch's awesome name, I always rooted for Everett, because I have a soft spot for crazy people. Remember that famous Bob Murphy home run call when Everett hit one off the scoreboard at Shea? "Oh, how far will it go!" Anyway, I remember Huskey as a third baseman but the Mets gave up on that battle; he actually only had 64 games at third, compared to 342 in the outfield, 124 at first and 88 at DH, which was probably his best position. We'll stick him in right field, where he played the bulk (sorry) of his career. His best season was probably '97, when he hit .287 (.822 OPS) with 24 HR and 81 RBI in 471 AB.
DH Butch Hobson: Clell Lavern Hobson played for the Red Sox in the '70s; his best year was '77 (.265/.300/.489, 30 HR, 112 RBI). He was awful defensively and struck out a lot, but he could hit the long ball. He managed the Red Sox for three seasons, and then in the minors; unfortunately, you might remember him for getting arrested with cocaine while the manager of the Scranton/Wilkes-Barre Red Barons. But he's back in baseball now, managing an independent league team.
BENCH:
C Butch Henline: Walter John Henline hit .324 with a .407 OBP for the Phillies in 1923 -- 37 walks against 33 strikeouts, in 330 at-bats. He liked to put the ball in play. He only had 14 HRs that year, but actually, that tied him for 8th, and with 3 more dingers he would've been tied for 3rd. After his playing days were over he became an umpire -- in the minors from 1939 to 1944, and in the majors from 1945 to 1948.
C Butch Sutcliffe: This guy's real name was Charles Inigo Sutcliffe. Inigo, how cool is that? Sutcliffe had just 4 at-bats (1 hit, 2 walks, 2 RBIs!) in 4 games in 1938. He also had three appearances at catcher and made two errors, so maybe he wasn't a great glove man. He was yet another guy who played for the N.L. team in Boston, then known as the Bees.
Why do so many guys named Butch get turned into catchers? There's five others who didn't make the cut: Butch Biela, Butch Benton, Butch Garcia, Butch O'Donnell and Butch Rementer. Biela, as far as I can determine, is the only active Butch in professional baseball. The 18-year-old hit .302 with a .408 OBP in 106 at-bats for the Pirates' Rookie Ball team this year. Go Butch go!
1B/3B/OF Butch Alberts: Francis Burt Alberts went 5-for-18 (with a double) in his only MLB season, 1978 with Toronto. He was a star player in college (University of Cincinnati) and a pretty good player in the minors -- he led the Texas League in batting with a .342 batting average in 1975 -- but he never really got a chance in the majors. Maybe it was the glasses.
1B Butch Kaufman: Butch Kaufman put up some monster numbers for Ashland University in 2002, hitting .400 (.990 OPS) in 150 ABs. Not sure what happened to him since, but I'm sure he'd sign up for this team. So much Butchness!
IF Butch Bellenger: Bellenger was an infielder in the Pirates organization in '96 and '97, never getting above A-ball; his minor league career numbers: .229 BA, .268 OBP, .316 SLG. Not good. But I needed a utility infielder, so he's in.
OF Butch Mierkowicz: Edward Frank Mierkowicz also was known as Mouse, which is a funny nickname for a guy who was 6-foot-4 in 1945. He played in four seasons but had just 63 at-bats (.175 BA, .494 OPS). He did win a World Series with the Tigers in 1945, appearing in one game but not getting up to the plate.
OF Butch Sanicki: Edward Robert Sanicki was a Jersey boy -- he went to Clifton High School and then Seton Hall University. He played briefly for the Phillies in '49 and '51, getting only 20 plate appearances total, but that was enough to set a major league record. Sanicki went 5-for-17, but with 1 2B and 3 HRs for a ridiculous .882 slugging percentage and .558 isolated power; that's the highest career SLG and ISO of any player with at least 20 plate appearances. His 1.251 OPS is the second highest behind the immortal Joe Peitz (1.262). He later returned to Clifton High School, where he was a special education teacher for 30 years.
OF Butch Will: Robert Lee Will played six seasons, all with the Cubs; his only full season was 1960, when he hit .255 (.694 OPS) with 20 2B and 6 HR in 475 AB. Oddly enough, he had 9 triples that year, and none in his other five seasons. He also stole just two bases (and was caught 6 times) in his career; how the hell did he hit 9 triples in 1960?
SP Butch Wensloff: Charles William Wensloff had a big year as a rookie for the Yankees in 1943 (13-11, 2.54 ERA, 1.11 WHIP), but remember, all the star players were off winning the war. After that, Wensloff was drafted. He was back up again in '47 and had a decent year as a right-handed swingman (2.61 ERA, 1.22 WHIP in 5 starts, 6 relief appearances), pitched two scoreless relief innings to help the Yankees win the World Series, and then just one relief appearance in '48 and he was done.
SP Butch Henry: Floyd Bluford Henry was a left-handed pitcher in the 1990s; he played for six teams in a seven-year career. I remember him as a reliever for some reason, but he actually had more starts (91) than relief appearances (57). In fact, there was only one year where he was mostly a reliever, in '97, and even that year he had 5 starts. Every other year more than half his appearances were as a starter. Anyway, Henry's best season was '94, when he went 8-3 with 1 SV in 15 starts and 9 relief appearances; he had a 2.43 ERA and a 1.09 WHIP. He's now the manager of the El Paso Diablos.
SP Butch Sanders: Roy Garvin Sanders also went by the nickname Pepe. That's a combination you don't see a lot, "Call me Butch or Pepe." Anyway, the right-hander had a pretty good year in 1918 for the Pirates, going 7-9 with 1 SV (but a 2.60 ERA and 1.20 WHIP) in 14 starts and 14 relief appearances; his only other year in the bigs was with the Reds in 1917, when he went 0-1 in two starts (7 ER, 12 H, 16 BB in 14.0 IP -- ouch!)
SP Butch Edge: Claude Lee Edge was a right-handed starter with the Blue Jays in '79; he spent about six weeks in the majors and got nine starts, going 3-4. And the question is, how did he win three games? (5.23 ERA, 1.63 WHIP, 24 BB, 19 K in 51.2 IP) I think the coolest thing about him, other than his name of course, is that his Baseball-Reference page is sponsored by Edge Embossing. If I need any microfabrication integration, they are definitely getting a call from me.
BULLPEN:
RP Butch Metzger: Clarence Edward Metzger actually finished his career with the Mets. How cool is that? Considering the '78 Mets finished in dead last, do you think the front office was like, "What the hell, Metzger, Mets, maybe it will get us some headlines." The right-hander actually did have one really great year - he won the Rookie of the Year Award in '76, going 11-4 with 16 saves (2.92 ERA, 1.39 WHIP) in 77 games. That was pretty much it. He had 140 walks in 293.1 career innings, which isn't good.
RP Butch Baccala: Here's a mystery. Butch Baccala pitched just one game for the Low-A Phillies in 1983; he gave up 3 earned runs on 2 hits, 3 walks and 1 wild pitch in 3 innings. But he also struck out 6 guys. And then that's it... he's never heard from again. Did some lucky fan win a chance to pitch a few innings? Apparently he's now a scout for the Reds.
RP Butch Pucetas: This sounds like the name of a porn star... hard-core lesbian porn I guess. "And starring... Wendy 'Butch' Pucetas as the prison warden." Pucetas is a reliever at Furman College; he gave up 12 earned runs on 20 hits and 7 walks in 14.0 innings in 2007.
RP Butch Mills: This guy pitched in 11 games for the University of Maryland (Eastern Shore) in 2005, going 0-1 with a 13.80 ERA and a 2.93 WHIP. That's 23 ER, 25 H and 19 BB in 15.0 IP. Wow. Hey, I'm desperate for arms.
So, that's it, the All-Butch Team. I have to say it's not a very strong team. We only have eight pitchers and half of them suck. The offense isn't too good either. Well, maybe we won't win a lot of games, but at least we'll all know what to call each other.
I understand the hatred of Carl Pavano. Anyone who had been paying attention knew it was a dumb signing -- Pavano had one good year amid lots of injuries. But, four years and $39.95 million later, now the Yankees know it too.
(Heck, if he was still with Alyssa Milano, I'd actually be looking forward to today's start. He also was dumped by Gia Allemand after he cheated on her. Apparently this wasn't good enough for Carl. He may have problems using his arm, but apparently not his penis.)
Of course -- Ivan Rodriguez. When pitching to Pudge, Pavano has allowed a .257/.307/.408 (.715 OPS) line, compared to .276/.330/.427 (.757) overall. Yes, Rodriguez caught him during his only good run ('03-'04), and yes, that was in the N.L. Still, it's something to keep in mind.
