Theme Team: The All-Butch Team

Whoa, I see I haven't done a Theme Team since August. Let's get back on track with a team near and dear to my heart... the All-Butch Team.

You might think this is a team of all women's field hockey players. And you would be wrong. That's mean. Because there are some women who play field hockey who aren't butch at all. And some who very clearly could kick my ass. So as to not to offend either group, let's move on with the team, shall we?

The All-Butch Team

What is your name?
Butch.
What does it mean?
I'm American, honey. Our names don't mean shit.
-- Pulp Fiction

I thought I could field a team of just guys whose first name appears as "Butch" in Baseball Reference, but there's not enough of them for a full team -- there's only 16. So I also included guys who are listed as having the nickname "Butch," and a couple minor leaguers. As it was I could only find eight pitchers, including two from college teams and one had just one appearance in the minors.

Apparently if you want your kid to grow up to be a catcher, give him the nickname Butch. I could barely scrape together 25 players for a roster, and yet I found eight guys named Butch who were catchers. Go figure.

The other thing I learned from doing this list is if you name your son Elmer or Wallace or Clell, and then doubly screw him by giving him a middle name like Le Roy or McArthur or Lavern, you can pretty much guarantee your kid will either be beaten up a lot, or beat up a lot of other kids and thus get a nickname like Butch.

BATTERS:

C Butch Wynegar: Harold Delano Wynegar Jr. came up with the Twins, finishing second in the Rookie of the Year balloting as a 20-year-old catcher in '76 (.260 BA, .719 OPS), but to me he'll always be a Yankee. A switch-hitter who could work a walk but had absolutely no power -- his career slugging average (.347) is actually less than his career on-base percentage (.348). How is that possible? You need to have a lot of sacrifices. He had 58 career sacrifice bunts compared to 65 career home runs. That's pretty impressive. He's now the hitting coach for the Scranton/Wilkes-Barre Yankees, a team I suspect will have some very good bunters.

1B Butch Schmidt: Charles John Schmidt had four years in the bigs -- one game as a pitcher with the 1909 Highlanders, and three years as a first baseman with the Boston Braves. His best year came in 1914, helping to lead the "Miracle Braves" to an improbable comeback and World Series sweep. Schmidt hit .285 with a .350 OBP, which must have been pretty good, because he tied for 16th in the MVP voting. He apparently was a very good fielder.

2B Butch Kolloway: Donald Martin Kolloway also went by "Cab," which is funnier. But someone apparently called him Butch. Kolloway was pretty big for a 1940s second baseman (6'3", 200 pounds) and later played third and first, but played more than 600 of his 1,079 MLB games at second base. His best year was probably 1949, when he hit .292 -- a very empty .292 (.359 OBP, .355 SLG, 7 SB, 7 CS). But that same year he had 49 walks to just 26 strikeouts in 487 at-bats.

3B Butch Keltner: Kenneth Frederick Keltner -- I've always heard him referred to just as Ken, but hey, it says (Butch) next to his name on Baseball Reference, and we need players, so he's in. Keltner's last game was in 1950, so as fans who saw him play continue to die off, he'll probably be best remembered for the "Keltner List" created by Bill James. Looking at his numbers now, it's hard to believe anyone thought he should be in the Hall of Fame. I guess his best year was 1948, when he hit .297 (.395 OBP, .522 SLG) with 31 HR and 119 RBI. That was one of only two seasons where he had 100 RBIs, and one of three where he had more than 20 HRs. But he was a six-time All-Star and was a good fielder.

SS Butch Kirby: The only Butch I've found, minors or majors, to ever play any shortstop at all. In 289 minor league games, Kirby played 19 games at short, and that is apparently the Butch record. Sad, isn't it? His best year was '81, in the Rookie League for the Brewers; he hit .307 (.736 OPS). His career minor league numbers are atrocious (.246, .618) but I need a shortstop. Apparently there also was a professional bull rider named Butch Kirby in the 1980s; maybe he gave up baseball for rodeo?

LF Butch Nieman: Elmer Le Roy Nieman was an outfielder with the Boston Braves during World War II. His best year was probably his last one, when he hit .247 but with a .361 OBP and .478 SLG; he also had 14 HRs and 11 SBs, in just 247 ABs. If they had rotisserie baseball in '45 he would've been a great $1 player for somebody. When the war was over and the stars came back to the league, Nieman was sent back to the minors and never got another chance, even though he put up some Jack Cust-like numbers: he led the Western Association in HRs, RBIs and BBs for four straight years. Like many other Butches on this list, he also was a minor-league manager.

CF Butch Davis: Wallace McArthur Davis had a hell of a rookie year in '83, but then gave it all back the next season. Really! He had I think two of the most remarkable back-to-back years in MLB history: .344/.359/.508 in 122 AB, and then .147/.211/.224 in 116 AB. How can you be that good one year and that bad the next? After that, Davis would have to wait until '93 to get another chance, and it was pretty much right down the middle (.245/.273/.415). He's now a minor league instructor with the Baltimore Orioles, not the head coach of the University of North Carolina football team.

RF Butch Huskey: Robert Leon Huskey was aptly named -- they said he weighed 244 pounds but I think that was with only one foot on the scale. If your last name is Huskey you definitely don't want to get sent to fat camp, but that's what happened. At the time he was "a good 30 pounds" over 244. I remember in the early 1990s there was a big battle as to who would be the next great Met batter, Huskey or Carl Everett. Despite Butch's awesome name, I always rooted for Everett, because I have a soft spot for crazy people. Remember that famous Bob Murphy home run call when Everett hit one off the scoreboard at Shea? "Oh, how far will it go!" Anyway, I remember Huskey as a third baseman but the Mets gave up on that battle; he actually only had 64 games at third, compared to 342 in the outfield, 124 at first and 88 at DH, which was probably his best position. We'll stick him in right field, where he played the bulk (sorry) of his career. His best season was probably '97, when he hit .287 (.822 OPS) with 24 HR and 81 RBI in 471 AB.

DH Butch Hobson: Clell Lavern Hobson played for the Red Sox in the '70s; his best year was '77 (.265/.300/.489, 30 HR, 112 RBI). He was awful defensively and struck out a lot, but he could hit the long ball. He managed the Red Sox for three seasons, and then in the minors; unfortunately, you might remember him for getting arrested with cocaine while the manager of the Scranton/Wilkes-Barre Red Barons. But he's back in baseball now, managing an independent league team.

BENCH:

C Butch Henline: Walter John Henline hit .324 with a .407 OBP for the Phillies in 1923 -- 37 walks against 33 strikeouts, in 330 at-bats. He liked to put the ball in play. He only had 14 HRs that year, but actually, that tied him for 8th, and with 3 more dingers he would've been tied for 3rd. After his playing days were over he became an umpire -- in the minors from 1939 to 1944, and in the majors from 1945 to 1948.

C Butch Sutcliffe: This guy's real name was Charles Inigo Sutcliffe. Inigo, how cool is that? Sutcliffe had just 4 at-bats (1 hit, 2 walks, 2 RBIs!) in 4 games in 1938. He also had three appearances at catcher and made two errors, so maybe he wasn't a great glove man. He was yet another guy who played for the N.L. team in Boston, then known as the Bees.

Why do so many guys named Butch get turned into catchers? There's five others who didn't make the cut: Butch Biela, Butch Benton, Butch Garcia, Butch O'Donnell and Butch Rementer. Biela, as far as I can determine, is the only active Butch in professional baseball. The 18-year-old hit .302 with a .408 OBP in 106 at-bats for the Pirates' Rookie Ball team this year. Go Butch go!

1B/3B/OF Butch Alberts: Francis Burt Alberts went 5-for-18 (with a double) in his only MLB season, 1978 with Toronto. He was a star player in college (University of Cincinnati) and a pretty good player in the minors -- he led the Texas League in batting with a .342 batting average in 1975 -- but he never really got a chance in the majors. Maybe it was the glasses.

1B Butch Kaufman: Butch Kaufman put up some monster numbers for Ashland University in 2002, hitting .400 (.990 OPS) in 150 ABs. Not sure what happened to him since, but I'm sure he'd sign up for this team. So much Butchness!

IF Butch Bellenger: Bellenger was an infielder in the Pirates organization in '96 and '97, never getting above A-ball; his minor league career numbers: .229 BA, .268 OBP, .316 SLG. Not good. But I needed a utility infielder, so he's in.

OF Butch Mierkowicz: Edward Frank Mierkowicz also was known as Mouse, which is a funny nickname for a guy who was 6-foot-4 in 1945. He played in four seasons but had just 63 at-bats (.175 BA, .494 OPS). He did win a World Series with the Tigers in 1945, appearing in one game but not getting up to the plate.

OF Butch Sanicki: Edward Robert Sanicki was a Jersey boy -- he went to Clifton High School and then Seton Hall University. He played briefly for the Phillies in '49 and '51, getting only 20 plate appearances total, but that was enough to set a major league record. Sanicki went 5-for-17, but with 1 2B and 3 HRs for a ridiculous .882 slugging percentage and .558 isolated power; that's the highest career SLG and ISO of any player with at least 20 plate appearances. His 1.251 OPS is the second highest behind the immortal Joe Peitz (1.262). He later returned to Clifton High School, where he was a special education teacher for 30 years.

OF Butch Will: Robert Lee Will played six seasons, all with the Cubs; his only full season was 1960, when he hit .255 (.694 OPS) with 20 2B and 6 HR in 475 AB. Oddly enough, he had 9 triples that year, and none in his other five seasons. He also stole just two bases (and was caught 6 times) in his career; how the hell did he hit 9 triples in 1960?

I don't need any more outfielders, but there's also Butch Simons and Butch Weis, and minor leaguers Butch Burrough and Butch Cole.

ROTATION:

SP Butch Wensloff: Charles William Wensloff had a big year as a rookie for the Yankees in 1943 (13-11, 2.54 ERA, 1.11 WHIP), but remember, all the star players were off winning the war. After that, Wensloff was drafted. He was back up again in '47 and had a decent year as a right-handed swingman (2.61 ERA, 1.22 WHIP in 5 starts, 6 relief appearances), pitched two scoreless relief innings to help the Yankees win the World Series, and then just one relief appearance in '48 and he was done.

SP Butch Henry: Floyd Bluford Henry was a left-handed pitcher in the 1990s; he played for six teams in a seven-year career. I remember him as a reliever for some reason, but he actually had more starts (91) than relief appearances (57). In fact, there was only one year where he was mostly a reliever, in '97, and even that year he had 5 starts. Every other year more than half his appearances were as a starter. Anyway, Henry's best season was '94, when he went 8-3 with 1 SV in 15 starts and 9 relief appearances; he had a 2.43 ERA and a 1.09 WHIP. He's now the manager of the El Paso Diablos.

SP Butch Sanders: Roy Garvin Sanders also went by the nickname Pepe. That's a combination you don't see a lot, "Call me Butch or Pepe." Anyway, the right-hander had a pretty good year in 1918 for the Pirates, going 7-9 with 1 SV (but a 2.60 ERA and 1.20 WHIP) in 14 starts and 14 relief appearances; his only other year in the bigs was with the Reds in 1917, when he went 0-1 in two starts (7 ER, 12 H, 16 BB in 14.0 IP -- ouch!)

SP Butch Edge: Claude Lee Edge was a right-handed starter with the Blue Jays in '79; he spent about six weeks in the majors and got nine starts, going 3-4. And the question is, how did he win three games? (5.23 ERA, 1.63 WHIP, 24 BB, 19 K in 51.2 IP) I think the coolest thing about him, other than his name of course, is that his Baseball-Reference page is sponsored by Edge Embossing. If I need any microfabrication integration, they are definitely getting a call from me.

BULLPEN:

RP Butch Metzger: Clarence Edward Metzger actually finished his career with the Mets. How cool is that? Considering the '78 Mets finished in dead last, do you think the front office was like, "What the hell, Metzger, Mets, maybe it will get us some headlines." The right-hander actually did have one really great year - he won the Rookie of the Year Award in '76, going 11-4 with 16 saves (2.92 ERA, 1.39 WHIP) in 77 games. That was pretty much it. He had 140 walks in 293.1 career innings, which isn't good.

RP Butch Baccala: Here's a mystery. Butch Baccala pitched just one game for the Low-A Phillies in 1983; he gave up 3 earned runs on 2 hits, 3 walks and 1 wild pitch in 3 innings. But he also struck out 6 guys. And then that's it... he's never heard from again. Did some lucky fan win a chance to pitch a few innings? Apparently he's now a scout for the Reds.

RP Butch Pucetas: This sounds like the name of a porn star... hard-core lesbian porn I guess. "And starring... Wendy 'Butch' Pucetas as the prison warden." Pucetas is a reliever at Furman College; he gave up 12 earned runs on 20 hits and 7 walks in 14.0 innings in 2007.

RP Butch Mills: This guy pitched in 11 games for the University of Maryland (Eastern Shore) in 2005, going 0-1 with a 13.80 ERA and a 2.93 WHIP. That's 23 ER, 25 H and 19 BB in 15.0 IP. Wow. Hey, I'm desperate for arms.

So, that's it, the All-Butch Team. I have to say it's not a very strong team. We only have eight pitchers and half of them suck. The offense isn't too good either. Well, maybe we won't win a lot of games, but at least we'll all know what to call each other.